Ask him if he wanted to go home and he would twist his face in an angle your eyes could hardly notice – a ‘yes’. Naturally, before unravelling numbers and prepositions, his classes began with me holding his chin and dragging his face down. He broke into a whole new row of laughter when came the ‘No’ session with me vehemently trying to turn his head against all his little efforts trying to resist me.
“We never managed to get him right how will you,” added the little oversized tee clad one peeping through huge glasses, when a supporter of my guy pinched him hard on his cheek. And then began another round of chaos as the whole bench rattled like caged hens.”Not again!” I felt like yelling but then an unknown part of me took over the class with pretention of authority which soon relented into childish reluctance at the sight of the likes of it.
I do not remember having felt so different before. It was not a romantic “hours flew by” kind of hoax but more towards reality. It felt like letting go of all the crammed up stuff in my head for the briefest of moments. I could be me, I did not have to fear judgments.
Kids – adorable? Yes that would be thrusting it in a nutshell but be with them and you will experience the vast inside. It would make you want to chase a flying butterfly, make you look around as you silently resist the feeling of plucking that rose hanging over that wall, it was what would make you watch the lizard running through your wall, it was what would make you admire the spider’s weave of the cobweb, it was what would never allow you to throw away your old drawing notebook, it was what would make you want to pinch your best friend at times, it was a collection of the feelings you have been holding on each minute of your life.
Perhaps the hidden innocence that we all possess, which finds its way through the dark cloudy lanes of the perks of maturity that we create for no reason, when you are confronting a child, was what pleased me. Simple arguments against complex debates, reasonless stubbernness to fight with logical demands, speaking out openly to face diplomatic manipulations – and you have already decided to opt for the former right? Yes thats what this feeling was all about – embracement of the self we crave for. Unravelling the saga of life was yet a long aspired dream.
Why did we complicate life? Making things go round and round the loop tightening up till it could be opened no longer – was it the monotonity of our days which dragged us to such worthless employment? Aah I wish I knew but unknowingly I was also a part of the same terrain. And the way out? Oops. None.
Life had never been so complex. The loop had always been a simple one. Though living young life free is yet a dream for reality, but these small moments which do not last long, which make us want to live; not for ourselves but for others, the moments which make us think, to ponder, which makes us want to create a change..maybe the smallest of ones – that is LIFE. That is living. That is the beauty.
“Bhaiya bhaiya yeh wala kar do na (Please help me out in this sum)” I could feel little cold hands touch my collar. His face shone bright with a huge smile. His innocence which did not let him know the thoughts he had made me receede into made me smile; I hugged him tight – tight till I could feel all myself draining into this unknown little stranger. How great how relieving must life be for him! And in a silent language of acceptance I borrowed his innocence.
Threads of pink created patterns on his white cheeks. His little Nepali eyes seemed to hold every inch of the secrets we all are hushed to speak out. It seemed I was confronting him and for the smallest of seconds in this world of dream-breaking reality, I was the lucky one who confronted LIFE.